Letting Go of Excuses

flip-flops
I spend a lot of time talking to parents and educators about unplugged play, unstructured time, and slowing down today’s childhood. And I’m not gonna lie, sometimes it can be frustrating to hear the explanations and excuses about why it’s not possible and how children won’t settle for it.

Children, not settling for play time? Children, not wanting to run and jump and yell and laugh with their friends? Not wanting to make a mess or have a bit of freedom?

Sorry folks, I’m not buying it. Children are born to play. BORN. Adults’ attitudes, choices, and rules often quell it, but it doesn’t make the inherent drive to play any less. Play doesn’t have to be as structured, plugged-in, or sedentary as it has become. But for this sad and ugly reality to change, so must the attitudes and behavior of parents, caregivers, educators, etc.

A restoration of the natural balance and joy of childhood will return when the adults let it happen. When we choose to limit screen time and encourage children to explore their yards, neighborhoods, parks, and schoolyards. When we re-adopt the phrase, Go outside and PLAY!” 

If you haven’t read my recent post, Resisting the Urge, I encourage you to do so. It discusses some the things we can do (or not do) to help this process unfold. And for a little inspiration and encouragement, please watch this beautiful video below. Don’t focus on the fact that it takes places in a remote area, but rather focus on the movement, laughter, creativity and sheer joy expressed by the children at play. Who wouldn’t want their children to have similar experiences?

Come on, you can do it. Let go of excuses and resist the urge… and let more of childhood unfold — naturally.

See ya outside! ~ The Grass Stain Guru

photo by: theogeo

Resisting the Urge…

Pink Water Crocs

It’s almost here — the end of the school year. Can you believe it?!

As summer approaches, so do longer hours of unscheduled time for many children. And while the temptation of structuring every moment is ever-present in today’s society, I would like to encourage you (well me, and pediatricians, child psychologists, and many other experts) to provide plenty of time for good old-fashioned, unstructured outdoor play. Allow for plenty of daily chances for children to be in the driver’s seat, making their own rules, and creating their own stories.

Resist the urge to over-schedule. Resist the urge to hover. Embrace mess and down-time. Let children explore and find their own way out of self-proclaimed boredom.

“Play not only affords children an early source of identity, but is full of useful information about yourself and the world around you,

for once not filtered through adult minds and eyes.”  — Libby Brooks (Author)

Here’s the thing: Children have spent the last nine months very scheduled, buttoned-down, and zipped-up. They’ve been tested. They’ve sat. A LOT. And they have listened — to instructions  directions, reprimands, and the word “NO”. So this summer, practice saying “Yes”.

As in, Yes you may:

  • go outside and play
  • read comic books out in the hammock
  • walk/ride your bike to a friend’s house
  • camp out in the backyard
  • play flashlight tag after dark
  • build a fort
  • plant a garden or even just dig a hole
  • go barefoot
  • get really, really dirty
  • be a kid

Your mantra: Resist the urge.

You can do it. I know you can!

See ya outside! ~ The Grass Stain Guru

 

Holiday Shopping: Don’t Lose Your Sh*t, People!

Childhood is pretty simple. No really, it is. But we adults over-complicate it and fill it up with noise and lots and lots of stuff. We are the adults — all roads lead back to us.

Door busters. Black Friday. Cyber Monday. Buying shit Stuff You Don’t Need Tuesday…MAKE. IT. STOP.

Simply put, the Holidays have become RIDICULOUS. There, I’ve said it. People, it needed to be said. And it needs to be repeated. RIDICULOUS.

And who has made it ridiculous? Hint: It’s not the kids.

Parents spending excessive amounts of money on mostly things children do not need, won’t enjoy for very long, and only want because some marketer told them they wanted it. Buying presents out of guilt. Trying to outdo last year, or the neighbors, or the sister-in-law. Whatever.

Odds are, this will ring at least a little bit true to you, unless you are a Super Zen Holiday Master, and if so, I am totally tipping my hat to you right now (chapeau!).

It doesn’t have to be like this. We can take a stand in our own lives and families and reclaim sanity. I’ve seen the idea of Four Presents floating around the last few years and I really like the concept.

Each child gets 4 presents: 

1.    Something they want

2.    Something they need

3.    Something to wear

4.    Something to read

Balanced and sane, with plenty of room for fun and whimsy. It also challenges you to focus on quality versus quantity, and forces you to really consider each child in a meaningful way. I like the idea of adding a 5th item — a coupon for one child-selected outing or activity. Kids will delight in picking an activity and helping plan the when and the where!

Will there be some push back? Most likely, but you can get through it and it will be worth it. (And after all, you are the adult – just sayin‘.) Plus, the planet will thank you. ALL THAT PLASTIC and excessive packaging for goods that are mostly made in China. Who needs it? More isn’t always better, often it is just more.

If you have children that are used to getting lots and lots of presents, talk to them about the real meaning of the holiday and how your family is going to shift the focus to spending more time together doing fun things, like ice skating, hiking, or game nights around the tree (or menorah or kinara). For very young children, they won’t know the difference and you will be setting a healthy expectation of the holiday.

As for toys, keep a few things in mind:

  • A toy should be 90% child and 10% toy, meaning if the toy does all the work and supplies all the creativity, who is having the fun? We want the kids to get great things out of a toy versus have the toy go through the motions set-up by manufacturers.
  • Keep movement in mind. Will this promote active play or sedentary play? Today’s children are spending 7.5 hours a day in front of screens, do you really want to add to that?

Here are a few posts that might help you out:

Two more tips…

Hope this post helps and inspires. If you have already over-purchased, set some things aside for birthday presents, give them to Toys for Tots, or return them and add that money to the Family Fun Budget (or save it!).

Deep breath — you can do it. And remember other people will give presents too. Plus the old adage really is true, what children truly remember is the gift of time spent with you.

Happy Sane Holidays! ~ The Grass Stain Guru

PS: Don’t forget to save the cardboard boxes — best toys EVER!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...