Bethe always gets me thinking. That’s what I love about TGSG and the information she shares. She makes me go: “Hmmmm . . . “ As with most issues, it turns out nature play is not black and white. I am not an educator or policymaker. I’m just a mom who knows the value of offering play opportunities to her kids. I like to think I represent the audience educators and policymakers are trying to reach. It’s kinda cool that I can see issues from both sides, since I also run a website where I often share our play ideas. (And, yes, I’m from California so I say things like “cool” and “awesome.”)
Let’s take a look at few blanket statements – just to get those wheels turning – maybe you can see where you come out on the wide spectrum of reaction to these issues.
Technology has no place outdoors.
Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods, offers an alternate view in his post called “Techno-Naturalists.” He argues that “any gadget can distract from nature.” If you let it. He uses photography as an example. You can get caught up in all the settings and forget to enjoy what’s around you.
There is actually a photo of me floating around with iPhone in hand at a park. I’m showing a 3 year old what a Phoebe looks like and sharing its birdsong. It took maybe 1 minute and I think he will most likely remember the name of the bird now and keep an eye out for it. The gadget went immediately back in my pocket, forgotten for the rest of the playdate.
Helicopter parents are bad.
With all of the talk about giving kids leverage and freedom from a very early age, you start to feel guilty when you help your kids. In the range from helicopter to neglect — I probably fall a bit more toward helicopter. In fact, I call myself a hummingbird parent. I tend to stay physically distant to let them explore and problem solve, but zoom in at moments when safety is an issue (which isn’t very often).
However, I ask myself “why?” all the time. Why do I still need to have them in sight? Why don’t I let them go to the park on their own? Why don’t I truly allow them to be 100% Free Range Kids, even though I was allowed to run wild as a kid?
- I hate to admit it, but fear and anxiety are definitely factors. But not in the bad-people- will-get-them sense. It’s more like the something-will-happen-I-could-have-prevented-if-I were-there sense.
- In my neighborhood, kids play without close supervision. However, sending them to the park on their own is socially unacceptable at their age. You can bet other moms would call me on it. When a lone kid shows up at the playground, everyone pokes up their head to spot the parent. Keeping my distance is my sneaky way of battling the social norm while still conforming.
Common sense needs to rule on this issue. Are these bad parents for caring so deeply about their kids? Certainly not. Will their children be scarred for life? No. Should parents back off and let their kids take reasonable risks? Yes!
I’m always conscious of the physical distance between me and my kids . . . and I just keep taking steps back as they get older. I think the speed of the retreat is really up to the particular parent and their own comfort level.
Playgrounds are not nature.
I agree. Playgrounds are not nature. But . . . playgrounds get kids outdoors. Kids move on playgrounds. I would argue playgrounds are a bridge to nature. They still see birds and bugs. They feel the sunshine on their faces.
Any parent who’s taken their kid to a playground KNOWS their child gravitates toward the pile of rocks, the uneven logs, the tiny forest, or throwing rocks in the stream. The playground is merely a prop for imaginary games.
Playgrounds COULD be nature. I wish we didn’t have such a traditional view of playgrounds. I wish safety concerns and lawsuits didn’t dictate their design. My friend, Alex, explores the many whimsical shapes as humans design them on his Playgroundology blog. Others, like Arcady on Playscapes take a look at less commercial and more natural designs.
Really? They do? I hope not. But I hear it a lot. Parents tell me, “Of course, my kids are just getting out of the playground age.” Some are 5. Some are 8. Some are 10.
I STILL ride down slides with a big “Whoop!” and holler. In fact, there’s a particular senior in my neighborhood who takes a turn on the swings as part of her daily walk.
So where do these older kids go to be outside? In Southern California, I guess kids spend some time at the beach. It’s crazy to me that once children are actually old enough to go to the park on their own, there’s nothing there for them.
Hmmmm . . .
Photo credit: Kara-Noel Lawson
Michele points Orange County parents in the direction of local playgrounds on her Fun Orange County Parks blog. Then she dares them to explore more of the natural world around them. She blogs as Play Mom for OCFamily.com and started her own family nature club this year. You can follow their adventures at NaturePlayClub.com.
NEW post: Pulling the Covers Off Bl… http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #parent #playoutdoors
NEW post @ The Grass Stain Guru: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks
RT @balmeras: NEW post: Pulling the Covers Off Bl… http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #parent #playoutdoors [some excellent points here]
Michele~
Have to tell you that I love, love, LOVE your approach to sharing outdoor environments with children. Each space, each place, each family, each child deserves thoughtful considerations by parents when deciding what works best for them.
Thanks for sharing your perspective!
Vicki
Michele, I think this is one of my favorite posts ever. I feel like you touched upon so many important points here & many that don’t get the discussion they deserve. I especially like the “playgrounds are not nature” statement. In fact, I’ve toyed with the idea of writing a post about why I hate playgrounds! (I know, probably not what you expected of me …). Truth is, most in my neck of the woods are too focused on traditional play structures & far less on opportunities to enjoy nature play.
This is a fabulous post Michele covering issues that so many parents are questioning right now-brilliantly written!
I am still out on the electronics and kids in nature – I use my camera a lot, just like my father did when we were young and even my grandfather too, (it’s part of my creative process).
And yes, I agree with Richard Louv, you can miss precious moments behind a lens but you can also capture precious moments too. It’s knowing when to stop clicking.
A camera has only one use where as an iphone has a multitude of uses and can become a distraction when in the wrong hands. When my children see me with my camera outdoors in nature, they see me being creative. I’m not plugged in!!
Michele, you are a great example of how to use technology responsibly around children. Unfortunately there are many who take their iphone and other gadgets with them so that they can still be connected to the cyber world-never unplugging-I guess it’s that constant PLUGGED IN that concerns me-what is that teaching children?
As for outgrowing playparks, I think it’s down to the individual. Here’s me having oodles of fun last week down at the beach play park: http://bit.ly/dax5Fq
Love the term”Humming Bird” parent.
Michele, you are an inspiration to us all. Loving your work, your writing and your friendship. Much love Marghanita xx
Thanks and big hugs Bethe. x
Marghanita Hughes´s last [type] ..Nature Fun-Butterfly Girl Fairy Houses Part 1
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Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks (via @balmeras) Thanks, Bethe! #playoutdoors
Pulling the Covers Off… http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #parenting #playoutdoors (via @balmeras )
Wise words on technology, helicopter #parenting & playgrounds from our friend @OCPlayParks, via @balmeras
http://bit.ly/9tjn0j
RT @OCPlayParks Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks (via @balmeras) #playoutdoors
RT @OCplayparks: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks (via @balmeras) Thanks, Bethe! #playoutdoors
@Vicki – You put it perfectly. I guess every family just has their own style. Guess I could have said that:)
@Debi – I do know what you are talking about. I’m a complete “playground snob” after posting so many over the past few years. All the best playgrounds have a natural component – like the one I took you to visit. However, I know that some playgrounds can be very limiting and standard. So your comment doesn’t surprise me at all. I hear it all the time, in fact.
@Marghanita – Hmmm . . . tech and nature. I strongly agree with you. We don’t have DVD’s on our car rides. We look out the window. We don’t own a DS or Wii. Camping with TV is not unplugging. When I have a choice, I take the no-tech route. And it’s usually a conscious choice to UNPLUG. As I do on most weekends. On family vacations. Whenever I get the chance! You make a good point that it’s up to the adults to set a good example. When I use my phone as a camera, or for the reference material (nature tracks, birdsongs, maps) then it makes sense. Love your pic!
Thanks for the support and RTs. Seriously the hardest post I’ve ever written. It hurts my brain! I just wanna play – I don’t want to think about it so much.
Michele´s last [type] ..Color Walks with Kids and a Camera
RT @balmeras NEW post @ The Grass Stain Guru: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks
RT @balmeras: NEW post @ The Grass Stain Guru: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le < Insights from @OCPlayParks
Very good timing on this post! I just got an iPhone and didn’t get myself any apps, but someone just gave me an astronomy one and it’s brilliant – the 4 year old has been out starwatching every night and when we spot a planet we can look it up and see it rotating, it’s moons and everything.
On the other hand, I was pushing my little one on a swing yesterday and she flatly refused to play until I put the phone down far away. So the potential is there to misuse it.
I just posted about a natural playground we found on our holiday, the girls had a ball scrambling over rocks and logs.
Deb´s last [type] ..13 Things that Change
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Love @OCPlayParks take on some important #parent issues: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #playoutdoors
Amen Michele! Your post is beautifully written and inspiring. It breaks my heart to think some parents don’t go to a park because they think their kids are too old for a park. Yes, it’s true that my 8 year old doesn’t want to be a park with only preschool sized equipment. However, once I engage her in the nature around the park (Let’s collect leaves for a fairy house!) or even start a round of I Spy, she’s more than happy to be at the park. And how about parks like Oso Viejo http://www.funorangecountyparks.com/2009/03/oso-viejo-park-mission-viejo.html that have crazy, tall slides that are great for bigger kids. I admit, those slides had me racing to the top of the play structure to go again and again. All kids and adults like to play…guess that’s why the video game industry is booming. I just hope we can convince more kids (and parents!) to enjoy games outside!
Dara´s last [type] ..Color Walks with Kids and a Camera
RT @balmeras: Lv @OCPlayParks take on sm important #parent issues: Pulling Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #playoutdoors
1,000s of hours spent outdoors as sisters, fostered by our parents to go and explore and create your own fun – OUTSIDE!! – has made quite the impression on you (and me). Thanks to Mom and Dad for giving you the foundation which has lead to this wonderful gift of writing about outdoor play for the benefit of all to see!! Awesome post! Yes, I say AWESOME too!:)
RT @balmeras: Lv @OCPlayParks take on sm important #parent issues: Pulling Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cn1jqP #playoutdoors
Reading ~ Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le
Good one, Michele!
Great points! Luckily I can let my kids roam free in our yard which has woods and a small creek. I don’t have to worry too much (except about coyotes I suppose), and I can let them have their own adventure. It’s funny- we have a park a block away and I would not even consider letting them go alone, but hanging out in the woods is OK.
In case U missed this: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le – really thoughtful piece from @OCPlayparks
Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le #playoutdoors
Great post! xx RT @balmeras: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le #playoutdoors #OCPlayParks.
RT @balmeras: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://bit.ly/cIu4le #playoutdoors
Blog closet: Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://t.co/7eDjoYx A great #parenting guest post from @OCPlayparks
Pulling the Covers Off Blanket Statements http://t.co/h5e9wBwM