In the stillness of a gray and damp Sunday morning, I am contemplating quiet. Silence. Stillness. We’ve talked about silence briefly here before, and it has come up in some great comments from readers. I think it’s a topic really worth exploring.
Are kids today able to learn to appreciate silence, or to feel comfortable with it? Do they get ample chance to experience silence in a world filled with video games, computers, iPods, and ever-increasing television viewing? As more and more children have cell phones and text or instant message, do they get enough time to NOT react to things, but simply reflect? And what are the true long-range implications of all of this? In this brave new world of ours, is silence at the top of the endangered species list?
Skyline Drive - Shenandoah National Park
I would love to know what you think, and I’m sure many could benefit from suggestions. How do you make room for silence and stillness in the lives of the children in your world? Do they have access to stimulation-free time? Do you see a value in this?
I know adults who are aggressively uncomfortable with silence. You can see their discomfort—it’s almost palpable. I wonder what it looks like when they are alone? What it feels like? I can’t imagine it feels good.
I also can’t imagine not being able to welcome silence — to not relish it and benefit from the peace it gives me. The time to recharge my batteries and simply be. I would be lost without it.
I look forward to your input. Now, speaking of silence, it is time for me to go seek some. I always find the outdoors to be a perfect place to be still. Silent. How about you?
See ya outside! – The Grass Stain Guru
@TalkDoc2 Mike — would love to have you chime-in on my new post. Cheers! – B http://bit.ly/zjvYE
RT @balmeras: New post at The Grass Stain Guru – The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE ….
Great article. When my kids were young, and would make noise just to make noise, I’d say “Hey, ssshhh, listen! Do you hear that?” The room would go quiet and my daughter would say “I don’t hear anything Daddy.”
“If you listen really careful, you can hear it. Ssshhh.”
She would be very quiet and say “What is it?”
“It’s silence.” I’d say. “Isn’t it beautiful?”
Nature though, brings about silence and reflection, because there are so many things to listen to, that are just under the surface of our conscious.
Thanks for the article Bethe. Great topic for a rainy Sunday morning.
We do take time everyday to turn everything off and just hang out. But, we’re homeschoolers so our schedule isn’t a strict as a lot of others.
I think silence is becoming extinct, to be honest.
As a father of four, ranging from 4 to 13, silence is a rare commodity in my house. Kids are always making noise and if it gets too quiet, there is an impending poke to elicit some noise. I suppose the type of noise has to be considered. Is the noise bringing knowledge, appropriate entertainment, or development of good social skills? Noise that serves no purpose and just fills silence may need silencing. As for the other noise, as a parent, I like Eckhart Tolle’s perspective of hearing the silence behind the noise.
I see my kids being quiet when they are reading, sometimes when we are hiking in the Adirondacks, or when we ask them to be quiet (but that only works for a few seconds). Appreciation of silence, however, is probably not a consideration. That might take a meditation camp for kids. Joking, but the point is that they would need something to focus on during periods of silence.
As for nature, I believe that it is the best way to appreciate a different type of silence with kids, but don’t forget to listen to the birds sing.
@TalkDoc2 Mike — would love to have you chime-in on my new post. Cheers! – B http://bit.ly/zjvYE
RT @balmeras: New post at The Grass Stain Guru – The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE ….
What a great reflection! I agree wholeheartedly. When I take my daily walks through my neighborhood, there are lawn services everywhere using huge gas powered lawn mowers and leaf blowers with the decibel levels of jet engines. The growls and whines can be heard for many blocks in any direction. When I was a boy, we had a rotary push mower that was people-powered, and very quiet. We had rakes. We raked. The next door neighbor could hardly hear a thing. Now even when children get outside, away from the television, the video games, and You Tube, they’re assaulted with a raucous cacophony of fossil fuels being burned, and they smell the noxious fumes of it all. No wonder they run back inside.
We need to give our children the great gift of quiet, the aural space of wonder, the opportunity to think and connect and play unhindered by the industrial sounds we bring into their lives without thinking.
I quietly applaud your noble efforts to gain our attention for what we are unintentionally doing to our children with our noise. And I say “Bravo” with as low a voice as I can!
Tom Morris
Yes, I agree. Sadly, some of us were taught the old adage, “Children are best seen and not heard.” Finding your voice can be a long process if you are living by the seen and not heard rules. I do think that things are different now. Kids are not as able to be alone and find comfort in solitary passions, silence included.
Another great and thoughtful post, Bethe. With a boisterous two-year-old and a five-year-old with a prolific vocabulary in our house, it is hard to find the silence. But when we do… it’s golden!
This is an area I have been thinking alot about lately. I myself meditate, and when I work at home I work in silence. But children, including my own, seem to struggle with working in silence,being still, and being with themself. Whilst I dont think this is unique to them ( I remember myself being unable to sit still) what we didnt have was constant distraction in the form of electronics to instantously amuse us, we had to use our imagination to entertain ourselfs. It is the dilution of this skill that will be interesting to watch in the years to come. As via implication not only will it be silence it will also be their ability to focus on one thing for a period of time, that may suffer. Great article, liking your posts!
RT @balmeras: In case you missed it, today’s post @ The Grass Stain Guru. A good Sunday topic. The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE
I personally prefer silence way more than most people. When I drive, I often don’t even have the radio or a CD going. I just focus on the beautiful day, the scene passing by, whatever. I think silence is an endangered species in our world today!
Once again, y’all are the best readers out there! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. You always give me more things to ponder in my moments of silence.
I sat by the water today with my best friend. We talked quite a bit and then we just went quiet. We stared out at the perfect day, enjoyed the feeling of sun on our faces, and listened to the birds sing. I have no idea how long we stayed like that, but it was just so restorative. I haven’t stopped smiling since.
I hope you have a moment like that very soon.
Cheers- Bethe
The summer I turned sixteen my mother, father, brother & I took three weeks to drive from Ohio to the West Coast and back, filled with many firsts for our family—Rocky Mountains, San Francisco, San Diego, Painted Desert, Meteor Crater and other natural wonders. But what I still remember the best from that trip is our visit to the Grand Canyon, where I experienced absolute silence (except for the sound of the wind) for the first time in my life.
I once saw an ad for an MP3 player that showed a bicyclist heading into what looked like Arches National Park with his earphones on. It just amazes and puzzles me. Why do people (of any age) decide they need a soundtrack always playing in such overwhelmingly beautiful and natural settings? What set of tunes could possibly substitute for experiencing the actual sounds and silence and power of such places?
RT @balmeras: In case you missed it, today’s post @ The Grass Stain Guru. A good Sunday topic. The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE
RT @balmeras In case you missed it Sunday @ The Grass Stain Guru. The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE – A Must Read!
RT @balmeras In case you missed it Sunday @ The Grass Stain Guru. The Sound of Silence? http://bit.ly/zjvYE – A Must Read!
Standing on the end of the dock, surrounded in snow-swept ice and a frozen wind blowing in our faces, my not-yet-three year old son huddled close to me. No airplanes roared overhead, the sirens of the city were far, far away. “Do you hear that,” I asked? He shook his head and asked what. Much as Adam above wrote, I told Cameron to listen very carefully. That was silence, I told Cameron. And we stood there to not hear.
I dislike being in households where the TV is on “just for noise,” and though I grew up in a house where the radio was always on, it bothers me. If we aren’t actively watching the TV it is not on. If we are not listening to a song or news we wish to hear, the radio is off. I’ll wear earphones at work, but only when I need to be left alone – there likely is no sound coming out of them.
For now, at least, silence does have a good strong hold in our home. Who knows what will happen when Cameron becomes a teenager. Here’s hoping I teach him well!
The Sound of Silence: Grass Stain Guru http://twurl.nl/l03eo3 #playoutdoors #digg
The Sound of Silence: Grass Stain Guru http://twurl.nl/l03eo3 #playoutdoors #digg